This whole security breach is like the gift that keeps on giving, isn't it?

First, it was announced that people who were affected by the Equifax security breach would be awarded $125 per person (or possibly more) after a settlement with the Federal Trade Commission.

Then, it was announced that too many people signed up for the compensation.

Now, those of us who signed up for the compensation are receiving this email:

screenshot via Pat & AJ

Let's pick this apart for a minute - basically, they're saying that if you do NOT have credit monitoring, you won't be compensated with actual cash.

This is rich. No, seriously. I'd swear about it more than I already have but I'm allowed to type that stuff here.